Wednesday, 31 October 2007

Wood-for-trees Obfuscation

Friday, 4th October 1996

Message at Preston Road Station today: "THERE WILL BE NO NORTHBOUND SERVICE FROM HARROW-ON-THE-HILL DUE TO A BODY UNDER THE TRAIN."
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Q: What three records would you take to a desert island?
B: I'd take them all.
Q: No, but what if you could only take three?
B: Then I wouldn't go.
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"Tell her that experiments have shown celibacy drives mice mad."

My favourite definition:
CELIBACY - female singer from Wales, whose hits include "Goldfinger" and "Big Spender" .
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Now rinse.

2 comments:

B said...

I'm fairly sure the "mice" quote is from MEN BEHAVING BADLY. The desert island bit may or may not be original.

However, I claim the Definition of Celibacy pun as one of my own. So there.

AKA said...

I miss those old "body under a train" announcements. Now they ambiguously call them "passenger actions", draining all the colour and drama out of it all. What is the world coming to when we can't even glean a tiny bit of joy from a platform announcement?